UP AND DOWN AND ROUND 'N' ROUND

As a child, I loved a carousel; the calliope music, the beautifully painted horses and the way I could get lost in an imaginary world as I was carried round and round in a never ending circle. Today, the thought of spinning around in circles is enough to make my head hurt but adding the up and down motion to the mix would surely cause an upper GI cleansing, if you know what I mean.
Our adoption is a bit like a carousel ride lately. We seem to be going in circles. I'm up one minute, down the next and it is beginning to make me sick! My meeting with the new lawyer in Guatemala was unusual. He offered to get Nola out of the orphanage (for a price of course) and he also offered to let her live with him and his family. That offer made me go hmmmmm. It sounded odd to me and a little uncomfortable. I think he sensed my uncertainty in that proposal and told me he and his family had fostered many children in the past and he and his wife were adoptive parents so that made me feel a little better. When I asked him what we would need to give him for foster care expenses, he said whatever we wanted to send would be fine. He also told me what he thought it would take (the amount of money) to get Nola's hearing moved up. We talked for about 45 minutes and then I was left to consider everything he had to say. He was very kind but there was something about him that just didn't feel right. I did my own investigation and didn't find any negative information about the man. The thought of getting Nola out of the hogar was so tempting and he said he could get that job done quickly (within a couple of weeks). Even though my gut instinct was saying "don't do it", my heart was already dreaming of the time I would be able spend with Nola during visits if she were with a foster family. I had talked myself in to it, and Mark agreed we could pay his fee.

After deciding we should have some sort of contract drawn up, I contacted the lawyer one more time to get all of the numbers straight. Well, that's when things began to change. Foster care went from "what ever we want to send" to $500 per month and the amount to get the hearing moved up doubled. I've read too many stories of families who got mixed up with lawyers who charged fees on top of fees and we can't afford to be one of those families.

So for now, we're stuck waiting again. I'm praying our original lawyer will miraculously grow a conscience and get himself motivated to push PGN to get their investigation finished. Even if the judge won't move the hearing up, at least we could know the outcome of the investigation and know if any birth family has been located who may want to raise Nola. If no family is found, there is no reason why the judge shouldn't allow the process to proceed (not that she seems to need a reason to hold things up).

Family News

I have been terrible at updating lately. So many family moments have passed without proper blog attention. I almost don't know where to start.

Our sweet Riley celebrated his first birthday! That seems unbelievable to me. Of course I had to make him a barn cake. He was born into a farm family so it was only fitting.

Mark and I decided (at the end of November) to put down hardwood flooring in our living room, dining room, hallway and master bedroom. The process was much more tedious than I had planned and took longer than I had planned. Tim and Jay chipped in and helped to speed the process along. The end result is absolutely beautiful!!! I couldn't be happier. I wanted a rustic looking wood with knots and lots of color variance. We put down a natural finished Walnut and it's perfect! We were going to get braided rugs to put down in some areas but I don't want to cover up the wood!

Since the house was torn up with the hardwood installation extravaganza, we had to put decorating for Christmas on hold until just this past week end. That's certainly not the norm at our house. Usually the Christmas decorations come out the day after Thanksgiving (and if I had my way they, would stay up until Valentines Day ;)

Our annual candy making day was yesterday. Wow, there is a table full of stuff and there are still some things we didn't get made. Maria and Dawson kind of slowed things down a bit this year. I felt like I just got things going and would have to stop to take the dog out or rescue him from Maria's clutches. He actually could eat her up if he wanted to. It's a good thing he's such a good sport.

I'll have to post some pictures later. I still have Christmas shopping to do, although I'm so far ahead of normal, it's almost comforting.

Wishing you all a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

The Pictures Say It All!!

Shortly after I published the last post, Maria and I were eating breakfast when Gloria came in and said "we are going to the hogar in 30 minutes and we can stay for two hours". Oh my gosh!!! I wasn't ready! I still had on my nasty clothes from yesterday, hadn't brushed my hair (or my teeth) and had no way of doing that since I didn't have my luggage.....no deodorant (and it's hot here) but oh well.........we were going! Gloria got us permission to come and visit and then to return first thing Monday morning just to deliver the stockings.

The visit was wonderful! The kids are beautiful (including one very special snotty nosed little girl) and they are just starving for attention! I would guess there were between 40 and 50 kids from age 4 and down outside playing when we arrived and just 4 women trying to be care giver, referee, booboo soother and play partner. An impossible task! They do their best but the odds are a little overwhelming. It took Maria a few minutes to adjust to being mobbed by so many little ones but soon she was right in there playing and having a good time. She didn't recognize Nola so I had to point her out. We had had several talks about not being able to spend all of our time with Nola so as not to call attention to our relationship with her. Maria was great! She talked with Nola for a few minutes, I got a few quick snapshots, then she came over to me and said softly "we have to bring baby Nola home soon momma". I had to hold back the tears (not an easy task for me). The time went by much too fast and we had to leave. As we walked out, Nola was eating a bowl of pasta of some sort and when we walked past, she offered me a handful. I wish I had had my camera out at that point, but I didn't.

She had on mismatched shoes. She wasn't very clean but she is talking quite a bit and played very well with the other kids. As hard as it was to see her like that, I wouldn't trade those two hours for anything.

Now for news on our case. Thursday, I went straight from the airport to PGN. What an experience! Mayra took me in, talked to all the right people and after several hours, they finally found our file. It was in a stack of files that "no one is checking on" said the PGN official who finally found it. He said if the lawyer doesn't come to check on the case, the file sits with nothing done. They work on cases that people push them to work on first. He told me the judge had ordered them to try to locate family who may want Nola. He said if the investigation is finished and they find no family, our lawyer could ask to get the court date moved up. The investigation has to be finished and it hasn't been started yet, thanks to my lawyer who isn't doing anything with our case. To say I was unhappy was a severe understatement! Today at 3:00 I'm supposed to meet with a different lawyer and see what he can do to help us. We'll see how that goes.

Please keep praying! This process is so hard on these poor children! Little Kinsey is having a very hard time this trip. She wasn't feeling well, which didn't help the situation, but the longer this process drags on, the harder it is on her and all of the children. We have to pray them home!!!

I'll try to post after speaking with the lawyer.

Ah, You Know What They Say About The Best Laid Plans...

...and it is oh so true. I haven't posted because our Internet has been down, but I'm in beautiful Guatemala right now. The weather is lovely, I'm all settled in at the hotel. The problem is, my traveling buddy and her son (who flew on a different airline) are stuck in Atlanta!!!!! Brittney and I were supposed to arrive yesterday and hit the ground running buuuutttt, things don't always work out like we expect. Hopefully she will be arriving today at 2:45 after spending the night in a crappy hotel with no luggage and no way to get anything she needed. There were major problems at the Atlanta Airport yesterday. But today is a new day.

Maria and I are here with Christmas stockings to deliver to the children at Nola's orphanage. We were supposed to go this morning and take them but I had so much luggage, I gave two of my suitcases to Brittney to bring. One of the suitcases has 75 stockings and the other has things to put in stockings and my and Maria's clothes and our bathroom bag...........in Atlanta. I don't even have a comb to put through our hair. Good thing we're staying at our home away from home (La Casa Grande). Fredy and Gloria don't care if we look a little shabby. Gloria is going to call the orphanage this morning and see what would be another time we can come. The kids at church have been collecting items to fill stockings with and last Sunday night, they stuffed them all. It was so fun to watch them. They truly had a good time knowing they were giving to children who didn't have anything.

We made and wrote names on 135 stockings (Thanks Alice and Kelsey). That was a job but I know the kids will be so appreciative. I wish I could be here to see them on Christmas day. The director is going to hold the stockings until then. Each stocking had a Beanie Baby (Thanks Jay) a coloring book, crayons, some candy, assorted small toys and some had socks. We also had some special gifts for the babies. They will get cute little blankets, a onesie, a pacifier and a rattle or teether.

One nice cheesy shot before the chaos begins and then.................

.........it's grab and stuff time.

A job well done!!

I'll post later about what I found out on my trip to PGN. Maria needs momma to take a computer break.

Where Has This Month Gone?

I've been trying to hold out and wait for some adoption news before posting but this month's going to be over..........and there is no adoption news to be found.

Soooooooooo, I'll catch you up on family stuff.

Our little puppy Dawson is not so little any more. At his vet visit last week, he weighed in at 22 pounds, on his way to 45. The vet told me we could get a good estimate of his full grown weight by taking his twelve week weight and tripling it. He weighed 15 pounds at twelve weeks, so it looks like we're going to have a small horse living in our house. That's OK, I love big dogs! Maria just loves him to pieces and the two of them waller the daylights out of each other.

This picture is probably a month old. He's grown a lot since then!


Kelsey's high school volley ball team had a fantastic day this past Saturday winning their sectional. GO LADY ARROW'S!!! The Regional is this Saturday. It's hard to believe Kelsey's volley ball days are almost over. We've all enjoyed cheering on the team. She had her Senior pictures taken last week. We got a sneak peek at just a few of the shots and they're fantastic! As soon as we see them all and make our purchase, I'll post some. I guarantee you'll agree with me, she's just beautiful!

Of course, no Sectional victory is complete without a cruise around the square on a fire truck!
I also had my big day last Saturday and it didn't hurt a bit! Yep, you guessed it, I turned the big "50". For those of you who are dreading that milestone, I'm here to tell you, it doesn't feel any different than 40 or 30 for that matter. The only difference is I'm carrying around a whole lot more weight than I did at 30 and I can't seem to get motivated to do anything about it.

I had some "big dreams" of being fabulously fit by the time I hit 50 but dreams don't accomplish anything on their own. I have yet to put any muscle behind those dreams so right now I'm a frumpy, flabby fifty, but I'm not giving up on myself. One of these days, I'll get myself in gear and then............Look Out!

Well, I wrote this on October 28th but didn't get around to posting it so here are the updates. Kelsey's team won their first game of the Regional but lost in the championship game. She was very disappointed but they lost to a very good team in a close match. Now she's on to training for track and preparing half time dance routines for the up coming basket ball season.

Two Years Today!

It's hard for me to believe that it's been two years since we received our referral of Nola. As difficult as this time has been, there are some families who have been waiting much longer, years longer in fact. Those of us who are left in this mess live from one anticipated date to the next. Unfortunately, for many of us, those dates come and go with no resolution in our case. I've been exceptionally angry lately. I know I look at this process logically and not so much through the eyes of the law. It's hard to see anything but logic when the law seems to be ever changing. Orphanages are over crowded and the children left "in process" are all around the age of two years or older. That means if a birth mother had changed her mind and wants to parent or if she wants to announce that her child was taken from her illegally, she has had at least two years to come forward and state that fact. It angers me that no one seems to be speaking for the children. How many times do officials have to check and double check and triple check paperwork? How many studies have to be done showing the ill effects of institutionalizing children for extended lengths of time before someone says "enough is enough"! Obviously, nothing is making an impression on the judges in Guatemala.

Last year, at holiday time, I was feeling blue that Nola wasn't going to be a part of all the family fun. But I just knew, it would be our last holiday season without her................................

This year, I'm not sure how many more Thanksgivings or Christmases are going to pass before she comes home. Honestly the reality is too difficult to consider. We're waiting. Not patiently waiting, not quietly waiting, just waiting. Waiting and praying for God to clear the way for our little girl to come home.

Happy Birthday Joshua!

Today is the birthday of my first born! I can't really say that it "seems like yesterday" but I do have some very vivid memories of that day........Phone calls to our parents in the middle of the night announcing "it's time"..........The fear that Mark was going to miss the whole thing!!!!! (upon arriving at the hospital, the nurse announced that since it was my first "it's going to be a while")...............WRONG!!! After she examined me, she quickly called the Dr and they wheeled me to the delivery room (yea, back in the olden days, you had to go to the stainless steel delivery room to give birth..............not real comfy and cozy!). Mark had gone out to find my mom and dad to tell them to go and get some breakfast because the nurse said it was going to be a while. He just barely made it back in time!

Joshua wasn't only our first child, but the first grandchild on both sides of the family! Yes, he was showered with lots of love and attention.

His early childhood did have a considerable bump when he was diagnosed with Leukemia at age 7. He endured three years of chemotherapy along with radiation and dialysis. That was a very rough go, but he came through triumphantly!

He and his wife are now waiting on the referral of their first born. What an exciting time! I can't wait to be a granny again!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOSHUA!!

Josh, with a couple of buddies he made on our last trip to Guatemala

Unbelievable...............

...............it's started......................ALREADY!!!!!

You know that time of year, preceding Christmas, when it seems like every TV commercial is advertising the newest and best gotta have it toy. Maria is buying right in to it! This morning already I've been called in for a Pillow Pets commercial, a Dora DVD commercial but the last one was the best one. Maria called, "come 'ere Momma, hurry". I came in to see a Huggies commercial playing. Of course, I was wondering what was coming next when she said "just wait...........watch...............watch". The commercial showed how Huggies diapers are cut so they are better fitted to an active toddler, all the while a little one is running and the daddy is running after him. At the end of the commercial there is a close up of the Huggies package and the Daddy's running foot steps right beside the package. At that point Maria speaks up "right there! I want those running shoes". I had to laugh..............................and then turn off the TV.

I also wanted to share how our family is growing..............

We have fourteen baby water turtles that have hatched over the last week. I dug up the nest when I thought they would have hatched only to find out they hadn't hatched yet. We (I should say I) brought them in the kitchen and kept an eye on them. I absolutely loved watching them!

Below is our first hatchling in Kelsey's hand. She named him Dimitri. Not sure why the name, I guess she thought it was a fitting name for a tiny turtle.

This little guy just couldn't decide if he wanted to come out into the world or not. It took him a few days to finally make up his mind.

Turtles, turtles everywhere! We're down to eleven now. Three little guys have found new homes with most of the rest of them spoken for. What fun! I've thoroughly enjoyed them! They're just adorable....................in my opinion;)